What!?! Gas station pizza? You're reviewing gas station pizza?
Well, yes. No, I have not so completely run out of pizza places to review that I have been reduced to this. But on my recent excursion along Rt. 104 in Wayne County, I was passing by a Valero station when a sign in front proclaiming "NY Style Pizza" caught my eye. My expectations were low, but my curiosity was piqued, and my hopes were high.
My expectations were fully justified. This was some of the worst pizza I've eaten. In fact, I didn't eat it, at least not more than the few nibbles needed to evaluate it.
The self-serve slices were sitting in a warmer on the counter. And I think they had been sitting there for a long time. Now it's true that a slice that's been sitting for a while is probably not representative of what a fresh pizza would be like, but that's why vendors shouldn't let their slices sit for a long time.
The crust on this slice was very thin, which I guess accounts for the "NY Style" claim. But in no other respect did it resemble New York style pizza. The crust was lifeless, with a disagreeably chewy texture, and a browned bottom that was slightly oily to the touch. The corncione along the edge - the saving grace on many an otherwise forgettable pizza - was no less awful, resembling nothing so much as stale fried dough.
Topside, the orangey, oily cheese had been cooked into a solid mass of what can best be described as burnt plastic. What remained of the mostly evaporated sauce was little more than a painted layer between the cheese and the crust.
I kind of like burnt pepperoni, especially of the cup and char variety, so that was the closest thing here to anything enjoyable about this pizza, but there wasn't enough of it to help, and what there was, was welded to the hardened cheese.
Sadly, the two employees with whom I spoke were friendly and helpful. I say "sadly" because I hate to give a bad review to a place where the people seem nice. Please, if you're going to serve bad pizza, then be rude, because it'll make my job that much easier.
But all I can do here is emphasize that I am grading this slice of pizza, nothing more. This may be a fine place to fill up your tank or pick up a cup of coffee or whatever else you need. But as I attempted to eat this slice of pizza, the word that came to mind - it's right there in my notes - was "horrid." It rates an F.
I'm afraid I don't have an address for this establishment. All I can tell you is that it's a Valero station on the south side of Rt. 104 in Wayne County. The Valero website shows a station in that area, but the address given appears to be incorrect. But I doubt that you're going to want to seek this place out, so no matter.